Thirsty Thursday: Pleasaton Wine Stroll and Bastille Day

If you're not going to see Harry Potter tonight because you have things like "self-respect" and "dignity" try checking out some of these events going on around the bay.

From pleasantondowntown.net. I do not know these people.

Pleasanton Summer Wine Stroll: The weather may not be particularly summery, but I've found that red wine always keeps people warm. Head over to Pleasanton for their 11th annual wine stroll. $30 gets you tastings from more than twenty wineries from the Livermore valley and East Bay, an event map, and a commemorative wine glass and lemme tell you, I am still loving my two ounce glass emblazoned with Mancini's Sleepworld from the Walnut Creek wine walk. 6–9pm. You can pick up tickets as early as 5:30pm over at Firehouse Arts Collective (4444 Railroad Ave.).
website

Bastille Day: I guess today/tonight is Bastille? For some reason I was always convinced it was the 15th (I point fingers at my mom and her birthday being this Friday). I was going to try and compile some sort of list, but Diablo did a great job if money's no problem (mo' money mo' problems) in the East Bay, and Grubstreet and SF Weekly have you covered in the city. Grubstreet makes mention of free cupcakes and free admission into RN74's celebration,  and SF Weekly tips readers off to a rather pricey but fun-sounding Anti-Bastille Day soiree for all of you French haters. Bonjour, merci, etc. etc. Now's the only time you may get away with wearing that ridiculous beret and boat-neck striped tees with ballet flats. And I'm sure you ladies will find something to wear, too. UPDATE: 7x7 has also chimed in with a list.
Diablo's List
Grubstreet's List
SF Weekly's List
7x7's List

What To Do This Weekend: 7/8–7/10

I've got some city stuff in here, but it sounds pretty neato so don't hate me. Plus, it was too damn hot out here last weekend.


Saturday, July 9:
Firehouse Art Collective Bazaar: Do you miss the recently shuttered SF Underground Market? I do (sorry Mike!) mainly because I never got a chance to go, letting excuses like "I need to vacuum the cat hair off my couch" get in the way. Firehouse Art Collective is hoping to fill the void Underground Market's forced closure left, and provide a venue across the Bay for many of those vendors. In addition to unique food, they'll have jewelry, fine art, and "health products". The bazaar will be up and be running every Saturday in July and expanding to Sundays in August. Fingers crossed for no problems from the Health Department, especially because they been getting mad coverage in the local blogosphere (I'm not help, and blogosphere is a terrible word). 10am–6pm.
3192 Adeline St., Berkeley
website

Omnivore Books Cake Contest: I just saw this yesterday, and got a little sad because I'm busy on Saturday and don't have an excuse to make a cake. But you can! Or at least go and appreciate the hard work of others. You can enter a cake for free, or pay $5 to sample as many cakes as you can in an hour in an effort to crown one baker the winner of most inventive cake. For some reason I keep wanting to call this a cake walk, which would be sweet, but $5 for as much cake as you can sample ain't bad either. 4–5pm.
3885a Cesar Chavez St., SF
website


Saturday, July 9–Sunday, July 10:
Renegade Craft Fair: The event, which is free to get in, features 200 artists showcasing all kinds of art, crafts, and jewelry. For you crafty types (or anyone prone to saying "psh, I could totally make that with my eyes closed"), they'll have interactive workshops, including the MakeArt station from The Museum of Craft and Design. Learn how to make accordion-style journals, the art of quilling 3D paper flowers, or make art and accessories from repurposed toys, all of which sound like necessary skills for starting that Etsy store you keep putting off. 11am–7pm.
Fort Mason Center, SF.
website

Also: Stop by Stanford's for the launch of BYOBMB (Build Your Own Bloody Mary Bar). Or you could go check out Disco Volante, which must have kicked up it's uber slow service when the Merc visited.

What to Do This Weekend: 7/1–7/4

Holy crap, you guys. It's July. ALREADY. What a sneaky sneaky month. I get that most of you have fantastic weekend plans already, but I didn't plan anything because a) I didn't realize it was almost the 4th until like...Wednesday and b) I assumed I would actually remember my work meeting and be scheduled to work this Saturday. Keeping checking back, as I'm going to try and update with bars doing something, anything, for the holiday (Spoontonic will be closed on Monday. Don't come!).

bart tree from Oaklandish

Friday, June 1:

Oaklandish Grand Opening Party: According to Oakland Local, Oaklandish is opening its first retail store and community space tonight. They'll be celebrating with beer from local brewers Linden Street Brewery and street food from Fiveten Burger truck and El Taco Bike. Pick up one of their popular hoodies or tees while DJs Spinnerty and Junior, followed by DJ Platurn, liven up the space.

1444 Broadway, Oakland

website

Saturday, July 2:

Breastfest: Do you like boobies? And beer? Get down to Breastfest and help the community by drinking one and raising money for the other. On a rare serious note, many people I know have family members who have been diagnosed with breast cancer, and this is a great opportunity to help raise money for women diagnosed with breast cancer who can't afford treatment. Marin Brewing Co. and Moylan's are sponsoring the event, which will feature pours from local breweries Ale Industries (yay Concord!) and Trumer, as well as Russian River, Stone, Moonlight, Drake's, Allagash, Big Sky, and Maui Brewing Company (and a ton others). 80s hair metal cover band Metal Shop will provide the entertainment. $45 advance/$50 at the door, which includes a complimentary tasting glass and food. 5–9pm, unless you buy VIP ($10 mas) for an hour head start.

Fort Mason, SF

website

from ventvox.com

Sunday, June 3:

Free concert! Neko Case and The Dodos at Stern Grove Festival. I love both these artists/groups and I am ridiculously excited because it's free. FREE. I missed The Dodos playing a free concert over in Berkeley, so I will trek it out to the city. Let me clarify, the boons of the city. THE SUNSET. I said I'd never go back there after I moved out of the fog monster, so that's how badly I want a free concert. Things kick off at 2pm. The Stern Grove Festival has free concerts running through August 21, so if you can't make it this Sunday, check out their website for a list of other performances.

Sigmund Stern Grove Park

in between 19th Avenue and Sloat Blvd., San Francisco

event website

Crusherfest at the Stork Club: Come see 12 bands crush you? I assume that's what crusherfest means. Starting at 3pm, you can see Paul Collins Beat, Nikki Corvette, Grass Widow, Scumby . These band names mean nothing to me because I listen to sleepytime tea indie music, but they may mean something to you.

2330 Telegraph Ave, Oakland

website

Monday, July 4:
Remember Tipsy Tow?: I mentioned it back for Cinco de Mayo, but I think it bears repeating. Call 800-AAA-HELP and tell the operator you need a "tipsy tow." AAA offers a free ten-mile tow home for drivers and their vehicles. You don’t even have to be a member. Tipsy tow starts at 6pm tonight and lasts until 6am. Or call a cab! click for: Walnut Creek, Danville, Lafayette, San Ramon.

Looking for fireworks? The only place you can get 'em is in Dublin and the only legal places to set them off are in Dublin, at Alamo Creek Park, Emerald Glen Park, and Dublin Sports Grounds. The rest of Alameda County and Co Co County frown on all fireworks, including "safe" fireworks like sparklers, but I know you want to do hoodrat stuff with your friends so for God's sake be discreet and don't be an asshole and burn yourself with a GD sparkler.

from sf.funcheap.com

4th of July at Berkeley Marina: If you're not into drinking (like, maybe two people I know), head over to the Berkeley Marina for jugglers, clowns (GROSS), food booths, a dunk tank, massages, free dragon boat rowing, and pony rides (if you can convince them you're small enough to ride).

Berkeley Marina

201 University, Berkeley

website

All You Can Eat Ribs: At Stanfords, $25 will get you all-you-can-eat ribs, plus your choice of two sides, ranging from cole slaw to sweet baked beans to fries or creamy potato salad. I really can't imagine staying inside on the 4th, but the deal is good all weekend so if you feel like being lazy and making someone else do the dishes, have at it.
1300 S. Main St., Walnut Creek
website

4th of July in Moraga: This event has a real name, that I saw while staring at a flyer in Panama Coffee this morning, but I forgot it and the city website doesn't have it, so screw it. There's a dog parade, for those people who like to dress up their dogs (I prefer shoving dog sized costumes on my cat), car show, "jumpies" (wtf?), and David Martin's house party. I don't know what kind of party that is, but this all sounds very family friendly so probably not a very fun one. But hey, there are fireworks around 9:20...

Event starts at 8am with some runs, but I wouldn't bother getting there until the dog parade at 9am.

Moraga Commons Park

1799 Saint Marys Rd., Moraga

website

San Ramon's Star Spangled Spectacular: I almost left this out, but you've gotta rep where you came from, even if it used to mean drinking watermelon vodka out of water bottles and stumbling around drunk on the Iron Horse trail trying to make it to the fireworks. Ah, suburbia. There's a kids area in the parking lot adjacent to Bollinger Canyon Road that features hamster balls! Why can't I fit in a giant hamster ball? The fireworks kick off at 9:30pm in Central Park, synchronized to music on KKIQ Radio 101.7. Don't bother trying to find parking, and instead march from miles away on the Iron Horse and relive those high school years. Your liver may say no, but I say it doth protest too much.
Central Park
12501 Alcosta Blvd., San Ramon
website

SF Mag Releases Best of SF

San Francisco Magazine has released their Best of the Bay Area results, but let's be real: People reading San Francisco Magazine mostly live in SF and are going to vote for city-based businesses. I can't hate, since I'm guilty of favoring my home city when I vote for Diablo's Best of the East Bay, but let's call it what it is, shall we? Check out the picks for the Best of San Francisco over at their website. Did you know the same people that love KFOG love Dave Eggers? Well, apparently they do.
Take me to the results!

Tuesday Newsday 6/28

Yes, once again, a late post, but I am battling the demons living in my throat and apparently breathing fire when I'm not looking. I'm the worst. Read this stuff instead and feel sorry for me.

Over in SF: Interested on where to find the best bloody mary in San Francisco? Donuts in the city? Best summer brunches across the bay? The Bold Italic, Serious Eats, and Tasting Table have your answers. Now who wants to go on a bloody mary taste test in the East Bay? And if you have major skrilla, go crash SF Mag's Best of the Bay Area party this Thursday. It will only set you back $100. Better yet, buy my ticket for me please and I will pump myself full of cold meds just so I can shake hands with important people as Drake's "Fancy" plays in my head.

In super old news...: Patxi's opened a Lafayette location. If you don't know...now you know. Go check it out at 3577 Mt. Diablo Blvd. I fell in love with Pizza Antica last night, so I'll be hard pressed to be swayed. Actually, who am I kidding, I'm fickle. Let's go eat pizza!

Smack some ladies: The Tri-Valley Roller Girls are recruiting! If you live in the Tri-Valley area (aka Dublin, Pleasanton, Livermore, or San Ramon) you can make like Rollergirl or Ellen Page in Whip It (depending on your reference) you can contact them over at trivalleyrollergirls@yahoo.com for more information about joining the team. I'm jealous.
[Source: Pleasanton Weekly]

Breakfast for dinner: Nick's Wheeley Good Breakfast Truck, owned by 22-year old Nick Bernard who's managing to make the rest of us twenty-somethings look even lazier, is serving up some serious looking noms in the East Bay. Cheddar buttermilk biscuit sandwich and Cuban breakfast sandwiches are always okay in my book. Check out the menu online or follow him on twitter to figure out where he'll be popping up, like Acme and Bites on Broadway.
[source: EBX: What the Fork]

New taqueria on Shattuck: Casa Bernal Taqueria opened at 2122 Shattuck Avenue last Tuesday. That's all I've got. Someone report back, since I almost never want Mexican unless I've been drinking.
[Source: Berkeleyside]

Late night service: The Broadway shuttle in Oakland will be running until 1am on Fridays and Saturdays starting in early July.
[source: Twitter]

Alright, that's it for now. Finally, right? I'm going to go dream of Bloody Mary's in a Niquil haze.

What to Do This Weekend: 6/24-6/26

It's Pride Weekend! Weeeeee!! I'm a big fan of all things gay, a rabid fan of all things drag, and have never really turned down an opportunity to day drink, so I'll start this roundup with some Pride activities, and finish it up with other things to do this weekend if you don't feel like making it out to the city or seeing a few socks on penises. Sorry, I know the offerings are a little scant this week, but I'm going to try and roundup a list of places near the start of the parade where you can drink, and I also need to focus my efforts on making this Sunday up to D, who I promised a nice leisurely brunch.

PRIDE:
The official SF Pride website has a whole list of official pride events. Today/Tonight:  The 33rd annual Pride Concert, 12 hour dance marathon Ghettodisco at the Endup, and SF Trans March (3:30pm). Tomorrow: Mamas and Papas Pride Potluck Brunch (all families welcome), The San Francisco Men's Spanking Party over at the Power Exchange (boys only!), Sundance Saloon Pre-Pride Dance (yee-haw), Go Bang! Go Pride! disco party at Deco Lounge (free before 10pm, $2 PBR and $3.75 vodka crans). Sunday: Massive Dance Party for big and bear men at Mist Ultra Lounge. I had no idea how many random clubs and lounges there were until I looked at this list.
website

Sunday, June 26:
Pride Parade: starts at 10:30am at Market Street and Beale and ends at Market and 8th Street. The theme this year is "In Pride We Trust." I'm trying to figure out a way to incorporate my afro wig into the celebration.
website
Hard French's "Los Homos": An all day celebration, with live music on two stages from 2-10pm. At Public Works.
website
Juanita More! Pride Party: 12 hours of DJ and performer entertainment. At Chambers Eat + Drink.
website
Misc: if you buy a half dozen cupcakes from That Takes the Cake you will not only save $11, but also help raise money for Pride.

EVERYTHING ELSE:
Residual Sugar Anniversary (All Weekend): My all-time favorite wine bar (aka the only wine bar in WC) is celebrating its one year anniversary this entire weekend. Expect live music, wine raffles, and a $10 anniversary special that will land you a glass of wine, sampling of cheese and charcuterie, tasting of port, and a cupcake. Not too shabby...
website

Oakland Zoo Walk in the Wild (Saturday): This is the zoo's biggest fundraising event of the year, which I guess explains the $150 price tag. Sections of the zoo are set up with tables from over 100 Bay Area vendors, where you can sample different food, wine, and beer from 5–8pm. Oliveto, Plum, and local brewery Ale Industries are some of the vendors to expect. Head over to Flamingo Plaza after gorging yourself to do a little dancing until 10pm, when it's presumably bedtime for everyone who can afford to go.
website

What to Do This Weekend: 6/10–6/12

I had a whole long post typed out. Like...spent a good hour and fifteen minutes on it and blogger then deleted all of it and saved immediately, leaving me with about two minutes of work. Thanks. So I'm just going to list this shit because I am pissed, and feel the equivalent of that time when you were working on a highschool paper the night before it was due and your Windows crapped out and you forgot to save and "oh wait maybe it's recovered" but noooooo, and nothing you type sounds the same.

Friday, June 10th:
Bites on Broadway: Food carts in front of Oakland Technical High School. Every Friday through October 21, 5:30-8:30pm. Karen Hester and Elizabeth August giving the middle finger to rules against food pods in Oakland.
45th and Broadway, Oakland.
website

Saturday, June 11th:
SF Underground Market: The daytime market is more like a traditional farmers market, whereas the night market focuses on ready to eat food, drinking, and dancing (my kind of people). Look for kimchi hotdogs and potatoes in tacos ("potacos"). 11am-4pm, 6pm-11pm. $5 each, $8 for both. To enter, you have to be a (free) member, so sign up on their website.
PublicWorks
161 Erie St., SF
website


Bay Area Brew Fest: $40, unlimited beer. Personal highlights include The Bruery, Cherry Voodoo, Lagunitas, Flying Dog, and Monk's Cafe (anywhere you gooooo, sour beer, I will folllllooooow yoouuuuu). 2–5pm. Don't break the seal or you'll spend half your time waiting to pee. Wear a diaper. It's a good look for you, I swear.
Fort Mason, SF
website

Cupcake Bakeoff: Pay $5 to be a total fatty and gain a false sense of superiority by judging the hard work of others. Sample 10 vegan cupcakes, get crafty, and take pictures in the photobooth. 2–5pm.
Rock Paper Scissors
2278 Telegraph Ave., Oakland
website

Sunday, June 12th:
SF Mixtape Society: Yes, I'm sending you back to SF, but I'm hoping you can somehow find yourself a hipster to have shameful sex with. And nothing says shameful sex like a mixtape about loneliness and unrequited love. Tapes, CDs and USBs all accepted. Theme: "Lemonade Stand." 4–6pm.
Makeout Room
3225 Mission St., SF
website

Outta the Burbs: Celebrate Lebowski in June

June is non-officially the Bay Area's month of Lebowski, which is great because it coincides with my birthday but terrible because I hate making white russians at work.

by Derek Gores, via Facebook event page 

by State of Shock Studio's, via Facebook event page

First off, because I want you know in time to check out opening night, is "Quentin vs. Coen: An Art Show Tribute to Tarantino and the Brothers." The opening reception, held this Thursday night (June 2nd) from 4-10pm, will be your first chance to view the mix of original paintings and affordable prints gathered into an homage to the two great directing teams. Opening night, expect free signed and numbered Big Lebowski prints to the first 50 to arrive, with approximately 100 mini prints being handed out throughout the night. While the show runs through the 30th, the only time to catch free arty swag is during the opening, so cut work early and book your ass up to San Francisco.
Spoke Art
816 Sutter St., at Jones, San Francisco
opening night 4-10pm, exhibit Tues-Sat, 12-7pm. 
event page

And in second but no less awesome news, Primitive Screwheads is presenting "Much Ado About Lebowski," a "live staged parody about a man named Sir Geoffery of Lebowski, who lived a simple, humble life until the day he was mistaken for Geoffery of Lebrowski. On that day, one man's quiet life turns into utter chaos full of kidnappings, escaped prisoners, rug peeing, theatrical porn, and a severed toe." The show will blend old Elizabethan text with the Coen Brothers' Big Lebowski (and Raising Arizona) to produce a one-of-a-kind interpretation of the Big Lebowski, as "writ by William Shakespeare."
Every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday in June. 
Doors at 7pm, show at 8pm. 
$20 advance, $25 at the door.
tickets
CellSpace
2050 Bryant at 18th, San Francisco

Outta the Burbs: Straw (San Francisco)

Every once in a while, we leave suburbia. And while this blog is about all the great things you can find without crossing a bridge or going through a tunnel, we'd be remiss in not mentioning some truly amazing things going on outside our bubble. Things worth paying a $6 toll or a $25 parking garage fee for. Which is what brings us to Straw, our first Outta the Burbs post.

Straw's carny cuisine started gaining buzz on local blogs like Grubstreet and Eater months ago, but just got its liquor license last Friday, which was enough to finally prompt a visit. We were lucky enough to sneak in before another duo could swoop the Tilt-a-Whirl table, seating made out of one of the carnival attraction’s retired red chairs. Newly outfitted with bright patterned pillows and a vibrant blue table, it took up a good corner of the already small dining area. The owner mentioned his desire to make the space feel more like a friend’s dinner party than a formal dining experience, and the collection of kitsch, low lighting, and tightly packed tables transforms the small space from cramped to cozy.

Real straw!

Other décor and whimsical touches included a mason jar lighting fixture, beers served in milkshake glasses (look for sangria slushies and pale ale push pops in the future), and water presented in recycled milk bottles. A pyramid of cartoonish vegetable cans (each with a big “yuck” on its label) stood stacked in one window, while a wide-eyed kid gleefully awaited cotton candy on a One Shot Harris print mounted on the wall across from us. But while the décor was playful and eclectic, the real fun came with the menu.

Don't mind the finger, focus on the wings

It’s intimidating in the sense that everything looks so inventive and playful that making up your mind sounds as daunting as sword swallowing. We settled on the Fireball (Mary’s free-range cinnamon sriracha buffalo wings served with a cinnamon cream) and the Mac Attack (mac n cheese with apple and Niman ranch maple-glazed bacon) for starters. We both loved the Fireball, especially the cinnamon cream dipping sauce, which D urged me to scoop up with my wing “like a nacho.” While he could have used more of a kick from the wings, my wussy mouth loved the restrained use of spice. The apples in the Mac Attack were a nice, crisp counter to the rich cheese and bacon, making the dish addictive, flavorful, and hard for our server to pry from our hands.

Mac Attack: Apple and Bacon Mac N Cheese

Main course selection posed even more of a problem for our indecisive minds, with D struggling to decide between the Bearded Lady (pulled pork, blackberry coulis, chipotle bbq, and citrus slaw) and Boxcar Children (Niman Ranch pork belly with peanut butter satay and jalapeno jam), while The Ringmaster (Niman Ranch ground chuck burger with cheddar in a house-glazed donut) and the Fried Chicken-n-Waffle Monte Cristo (Mary’s free-range chicken breast with raspberry jam and swiss on a Belgian waffle) duked it out in my dome. We ended up deciding on the Bearded Lady and The Ringmaster, shoving our children’s book-covered menus out of reach to prevent further wavering.

Bearded Lady

Ringmaster

I loved the Ringmaster. Ever since watching the episode of Man Vs. Food where Adam eats a Krispy Kreme burger, a craving for burgers wrapped in pastries has remained deep-seated in my psyche. The simple combination of salty burger and sweet donut, and omission of any other ingredients (it's seriously just burger cheese and bun), results in a balance of tastes, leaning slightly more towards the savory initially but finishing with a subtle sugar-glaze taste. Like all the best foods, you can feel your arteries slowly clogging and your organs slowing down. We both subbed in crispy sweet potato tater tots for the chips that come with the sandwiches, which were served with a bbq sauce and used as a breather between burger bites. I was already well past dangerously full levels, so I couldn't bring myself to sample D's pulled pork, which he assured me was delicious in the meat department but lacking in the slaw, which is served on the side.

Tots!

Funnel Cake, with Cotton Candy and Corn on the Cob Gelato in Background

We finished with a powdered sugar-dusted funnel cake with three different dipping sauces. One was a very thin chocolate sauce, not unlike what the Spanish serve with their churros, and the other two consisted of a vanilla pudding and chunky strawberry preserves. The orange blossom cotton candy (tufts of spun sugar the color of a blue slushie) dissolved almost instantly in our mouths, leaving lingering hints of sugary goodness and summertime nostalgia. I had to ask our server what the deuce corn on the cob gelato was, and out came a scoop of creamy gelato, mottled with bright yellow pieces of corn destined to end up between your teeth. I couldn’t hang, but D (disclaimer: he likes the buttered popcorn jellybean) was a fan. So take from that what you will.

Conjoined twins, guarding our bill

We did it big at Straw, and our bill was about right for being gratuitously gluttonous, to the extent that I felt the need to take a nap on the car ride home (at approximately 9pm), and I couldn't even look at nearby liquid nitrogen ice creamery Smitten. For two appetizers, two entrees, two desserts (the corn on the cob gelato was a sample , which due to a kitchen mix up ended up a full-size portion), and two beers each, we rang up about a $75 tab. Not exactly cheap, but I'll gladly eat poor people salad (not the organic kind, but the kind you get from Target) and live off the memory of donut burgers and sriracha wings until I can afford to eat out again next week.




Straw
203 Octavia at Fell, San Francisco
(415) 431-3663
strawsf.com
Mon-Fri 5-10pm
Saturday 10am-3pm, 5-10pm
Sunday 10am-3pm, 5-9pm

Chicken and Waffles! (Says Diablo Dish)

Ever since the sign went up for a chicken and waffle place in downtown Walnut Creek, images of waffles and fried chicken dancing hand in hand have plagued my dreams. And while I feel like a scolded puppy when Ethan over at Diablo Dish follows "Opening alert" with "no it's not Home of Chicken and Waffle," he does bring news of ANOTHER place (upcoming La Boulange, over in half of the old Bing Crosby's space) that will be slapping chicken on a waffle and calling it a day. So I can't hate.


This week's dish is also full of other awesome fresh restaurant tidbits (Incontro is moving to Danville! It wants to be closer to me!), so go check it out. No, seriously, they have contacts and resources over there, whereas I intend to call places after I get off of my day job and instead slip into a precarious food coma after eating things like a burger with a glazed donut for a bun.